Comments on: On starting over.

By: erin@designcrisis

erin@designcrisis — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 16:22:18 +0000

Having a baby is hard, but nothing more difficult than what you’ve already gone through. Find a flexible program and go for it. It’s never too late!

By: Shilo Byrd

Shilo Byrd — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 10:41:17 +0000

Yes, it’s official. My mother is awesome.

By: kylie

kylie — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 05:07:34 +0000

I like what mom says!

By: Mary Royal aka Mom

Mary Royal aka Mom — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 03:56:15 +0000

Mangos are good!Mangos are kinda pregnate if you think about. Big, round and a huge seed in the middle. Life is always about change and growth, going to school and receiving a degree is a wonderful idea and parenthood is something that happpens when you least expect it for most of the world. all the same, we learn to deal with both things and it all works out. you DON’T have to choose one or the other. It’s not either or. It is what it is. do both or not, parenthood doesnt completely define who and what you are and nither does an education. It’s a “whole picture” kind of thing that defines you as a person.

By: Shilo Byrd

Shilo Byrd — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 09:10:07 +0000

Thanks ladies, for your thoughts. I really appreciate it.

Unfortunately for my planning-obsessed self, thinking about these kinds of issues pretty much never resolves into a neat fully-formed plan. Damn this messy uncontrollable life and circumstances thing!

I’ll be figuring it all out as I go. with mangoes. :)

By: A'Dell

A'Dell — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 05:13:55 +0000

It’s never too late to start with school. Really, it’s never. The great thing about school is that it can concurrently be achieved with many other goals. (Including family).

But, as a women who struggled mightily with unexplained infertility, I can tell you that trying to PLAN children can be frustrating. Really, it’s something that is very difficult to plan in the first place, even without any obvious health issues.

In the same breath though, I totally get it – you want to make sure that whatever children you may have, have the best life possible. If school helps, then why not achieve that first? And kids are complicated! Why not get school out of the way?

I suppose I would offer the opinion that you don’t have to pick. It takes 9 months to make a baby and lots of women routinely go back to work 3 months after that. If you want to do both – you can. It’s totally possible. It’s a juggle, but there’s no reason to section it out into separate years.

Work on both goals and deal with what life gives you. There’s no reason to parse it out.

This is total assivce, isn’t it? Ugh. I AM SORRY. Just, you know, eat a mango before you landlord collects it.

By: Kylie

Kylie — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 04:13:15 +0000

If you’re looking at studying in Australia, there are lots of flexible options. Many universities (including mine) offer distance education or, even better, flexible learning – you can split between on- and off-campus study and choose a study load that suits your circumstances. This means that you have the option of parenthood AND study at the same time (and it’s why I can work a full-time job and still complete a degree in my own time, plus still have other projects on the go).

I’m sure it’s fucking hard. But I’ve known plenty of people to do it and they’ve done just fine. In fact, having to juggle parenthood and study would possibly make someone more disciplined and determined to succeed.

I don’t think you have to choose at all. If you want both, do both. There are more opportunities now for this kind of thing than there has ever been.